Gone Fishing!

Off the Grid

Cecil the Lion

I logged on to Facebook for the first time (facebook.com/bigfootinthecity) and was crushed to learn of the untimely death, nay, murder, of my fellow predatory genius, Cecil the lion.  Given that I possess a very specific and limited set of skills, none of which are diplomacy, I have taken it upon myself to hunt this tooth doctor down.  I remember him from long ago when I visited the forests of Milwaukee and he tried to lure me out of my protective glade.  I didn't survive this long by not being smarter than a retired lion.

My plan will be to lure him from hiding with the sound of cries from a mistreated secretary,  a large stack of vintage crossbow magazines and a small duffel bag of lightly-used camouflage cargo jorts. I am currently in talks with my DUFF, Justin Timberlake, to start a conservation campaign, "Preventing The Propagation of Lion-Hunting Tooth Doctors" (or PTPOLHTD).

I am offering a free Foot T-shirt to the person who delivers this barbaric creature to the edge of the forest, any forest.  In the mean time, I am in the market for a good taxidermist if anybody has any suggestions.

Somewhere to help:  http://wildcru.org/

Deforestation

The Turtle Whisperer

Crypto-Jealousy

Enhance

Foot Tees Campaign

Hello friends, if I may be so bold.  I am leaving my forest home for the big city.  As an apex predator, I can only assume that this feeling in my stomach is fear.  It feels like something between bad elk and sleeping bag-wrapped gingers.  The thing is, I suffer from a sort of speech impediment.  Every time I open my mouth to speak, it comes out as, "nom nom nom," and then there is no one to talk to.  However, I have decided to relocate and I will be getting my first big city apartment soon.  In order to pay for the apartment, I am selling t-shirts promoting the existence of me.  I hope it works out.

Elevator

First Encounter